ENKINDLER

I will invite you to drink tea with me

in hopes that my mind will be at ease…

like the dragon who looks deep within,

some times the enemy is your best friend.

Cntrl Alt Delete

dedicated to friends thrown by the winds of life changes…

Insight into this poem.

Cntrl alt delete” is a poem about LIFE. CHANGES. The poem can be read in two ways. It can be seen as an actual enemy to fear , or an enemy that is actually a best friend in disguise. IT is about someone who teaches you a valuable lesson. Either way, it is about life and how it can fool you sometimes. It applies to the many people we may encounter in  life and the  lessons learned from them. It means never having to say your sorry.

The keyboard script  is a means of transfering my modern day notebookstyle poetry into the modern age.

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Last night I had a very intense vivid recurring dream. I was on Apache tribal lands. I was being dressed as a warrior and being prepared to fight another warrior. I was being dressed  by a very attractive topless female who knew how to use the weapons. WE were next to a very hot fire. She showed me how to hold the knives. They were very claw-like weapons. She said these are our sacred instruments and they will protect you. I looked at them and they were shaped like Eagle claws. Before I could speak a Shaman spoke to me and said…these are the claws of an Eagle… Use them wisely.

As I exited the tent area….I saw the warrior I was to fight. I was terrified, he was fierce and seemed to know how to use the weapons with skill and fluidity. As I looked at him I had compassion on him, the Shaman heard my thoughts and said, you have passed the first test……..to look upon another human with intent to kill is a serious thing, you should respect and honor that.

Then my father spoke to me and said son, use the flat-foot defense position and you will do well. As I walked out onto the circle the warrior had his back to me. I immediately cut my arms and head, so that I would be covered in my own blood to look  intimidating. The Shaman said, Blood is life….Do your best. When the warrior turned around… he looked just like myself. Before we could fight I awoke. Then had the same dream once more upon falling asleep. I woke up very dehydrated and covered in sweat. I was crying as I woke. Wailing actually.

When I awoke the second time I had a strong desire to find this place.

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I hope you won’t fade to black

too soon to see the pleasures of the past

and futures end come to birth

Eyes green as the Earth

Hardened by it’s turning

determined as a demon

to find peace amongst the yearning

lost in the belly of the Goddess

reasonably unrehearsed from the beginning

acceptance is really the only thing worth pursuing

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Feeling like going as far away

from memories that stalk me

to a place where love is velliety

Realizing my true being

and accepting the total parts of me.

Knowing who I am and want to be.

All I want is to be happy,

independent of circumstance or authority.

Enjoy the pleasure and the pain equally.

Accepting the wonderous mess of life and it’s possibilities.

In my mind,  a seedling life force green.

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In a position I somewhat chose

though my thoughts are clear

my future unknown

who knows where

I’ll land from here

on this journey

absent of fear

all I can do is be myself, by myself

stay true to me

rebirth has placed me here before

this is when I pray for that open door

counting on hope to keep me off the floor

rebounding from a life of bouncing

like a nomad

this poet’s life entrancing

to all the friends I’ve had as lovers

thank you for the time spent undercover

who can forget the weekend getaways

time away from time

that seemed to last for days

mesmerized that this life is such a mystery

full of joy and entrenched in tragedy

yet a wonder for those who care to see

dreams that take away disease

entropic memories

still moments encased perfectly

for the lessons learned and lost

fading to darkness has it’s cost

treading water through the chaos

independent and free of thought

grateful to be here in this spot

thankful I am able to pause.

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